Sunday 14 July 2013

SWEET TASTE TEST YAY

I do too many of these.

Hello, My parents are back from Menorca. They came baring gifts and mild tans, among which was a pack of sweets each for my brother and I.



Whisked away by temptation, I am about to eat said sweets despite the fact I need to be up at 8:30 or something only the working man sees. As always, I feel the powers of my tastebuds should not be witheld from the occasional public viewing, and once again we find ourselves reviewing sweets.

The package is adornished with badly written English, corny ol' Spanish and German that I didn't bother reading as I have forgotten most German except for like: Man solst Freitag acht. Also there are some loverly little picturoonies of various touristy type lugares.



I have to eat these before the 1st of July 2015 and/or the second coming. The Spanish says Hard Sweet Fruit Sweet. I'm finding it brash and perhaps a bit off putting. These sweets aren't polite, they're in your face.



Oooooh it contains E numbers how exciting.
Carcinogens and hyperactivity inducing, highly regulated chemicals are obviously extremely necessary in Hard Sweets Fruit Sweets.

There is no indication as to how many varieties of flavours their are, and I'm shuffling through experiencing some kind of high from the intoxicating smell of these sweets.



I have plucked out 6 individuals to participate in this tasting activity.

We have:
Fresa or Strawberry
Naranja or Orange
Manzana or Apple
Platano or Banana
PiƱa or Pineapple
and the unamed underdog which smells lemony but has a picture of both lemon and lime so we'll go with 'Unpopular Citrus Fruit Flavour'



Seeing as Satan is involved and has included Banana, We will test it first because I hate it and I'm already nearing tears.

BANANA:



Okay, so they're boiled sweets, as I was expecting from the DURO part earlier. It honestly smells like cinammon so, we'll try it.

Okay no that definitely tastes like banana. Definitely definitely. Like freeze dried hell. I hate this and they're really hard ugh. Right that was just unfair. Evil.

Moving on to something safer.

STRAWBERRY:



I forgot to smell it in my haste!

It tastes really vaguely of strawberry. Like pathetic children's yoghurt flavour strawberry that you get at youth club. I want you to know that whilst eating these I'm simultaneously researching E-numbers and Lyme disease.

This is such a boring flavour. Oh i am not enjoying this taste test It's really unsatisfying.

Right perhaps something with a bit of zest might wake me up.

ORANGE:



This has better not pith me off. SMELLS LIKE THOSE CHEAP LOLLIES THAT USED TO CUT YOUR TONGUE OPEN.

Ah my faves. The patterns LOOKED like the fruits on the packaging. It tastes like it too. It tastes like jelly. I love orange it's so good. My faith in touristic confectionary exports is beginning to rise.

These take so long to eat. I've been writing this for 45 minutes :'(

APPLE:



Party timeeee! Smells like nothing though I'm pretty sure I just breathed in boiled sweet apple particles. Haha it tastes like flat apple tango, and like sugar, and also that weird apple popping candy I had once. I am actually mildly allergic to apple and banana so this was a horrendously bad idea because now my mouth and nose is all itchy and horrible. All for the sake of a blog post.

It tastes so lame haha.

Only 3 left.

PINEAPPLE:



Smells promising, but unplaceable. Very sugary, very pineapple. I am being bitten on the ankles by a bug whilst having some kind of brain numbing synthetic pineapple induced experience.

It tastes faker than barbie's sun bed.

WILL THIS EVER BE OVER!?

Oh I've only got 1 left (can't do maths)  PRAISE THE LORD.

ExCePt FoR tHe FaCt It'S tHiS fLaVoUr.

Although, further inspection has lead me to realise it says Limon or Lemon on it but I'm too blind to notice ahaha.

Give it up for....

UNPOPULAR CITRUS FRUIT:



It tastes like ginger?

I didn't smell it whoops. But it tastes like ginger and lemon at the same time. A bit like when my friend made some cookies that were great and had like some seeds beginning with C in as well as lemon. **brb googling seeds**

Wikipedia is amazing. I am browsing currently a 'List of edible seeds'. Enlighetning.

It wasn't on that list though I have procured the culprit which I believe to be Cardamom.

This is my favourite one actually!

Right, thank god that's over. Only took me an hour to write haha, and longer it shall to add photos and publish the twonking thing.

Much love forever and always,

Rachel.